After being in the wedding and event business for 17 years, I have encountered many clients who are attempting to plan their wedding while still reeling from the high of getting engaged and sorting through many bridal magazines to find ideas, inspiration, and the perfect dress. They get caught in a whirlwind of dress styles, accessories, and beautiful venues—not to mention the cost of all these things—when all of a sudden, the reality of the situation starts to set it. They go from, “What do I need to get first?” to “How do I put it all together?” before finally throwing their hands up amid a flurry of magazine clippings, screenshots, or even full binders of notes about their vision for their wedding day. Then, one day, a friend or family member says to them, “I think you may need a wedding planner.”
Many brides may say, “Oh no, I do not need that; I can do it on my own.” Meanwhile, others may say, “No, I just can’t afford that extra cost.” When I first got married, that is exactly what I said, and I took on the challenge of doing everything by myself, only to become burnt out and tired on my wedding day and deep in debt because I didn’t budget correctly or utilize the resources and support that a wedding planner can provide.
To help those brides who are at the same stage in their planning process as I was, I have put together five truths and un-truths about wedding planners. Hopefully, this will provide a better understanding as to why having a wedding planner is a very good thing.
Five Lies About Wedding Planners
Wedding Planners Want To Take Our Money
This is quite a common statement that may go along with un-truth number four, which we will discuss below. As a wedding planner, I first ask the bride what their budget is and what they need the most assistance with. I then create a comprehensive package that will fit into the overall budget. It is a planner’s job to be mindful of the priority level of each part of the wedding so that they can make recommendations of how to allocate the budget and create a package that best fits the scenario.
Wedding Planners Take Care of Everything
Wedding planners should clearly explain what services they provide and what services may cost their client extra or need to be outsourced to a third party. Although planners are very much involved in pulling all the vendor services together, they do not necessarily provide all the services under one package. For example, RSVP management is normally a very involved task that includes making sure all invitations go out, all RSVPs are accounted for, and the guest list and seating at the ceremony or reception are finalized. As a result, this is often an extra cost, as is the case in my pricing. However, this is also something that can be remediated through websites that assist with RSVP management and allow you to send online invitations.
3. Wedding Planners Don’t Do Much
I have been in a position where I was told this blatantly by a bride’s friend, and I’ve heard stories of other wedding planners being told this as well. If you are a wedding planner who finds yourself in this situation, remember that it is all about educating your clients from the beginning. Even though they may be overwhelmed, putting each step in a timeline format can help alleviate the stress of this daunting experience. Communication is always the best remedy for any uncertainty or incorrect information that your client may receive from others along the way.
4. Wedding Planners Are Only for Rich People or Celebrities
Long ago, I even said this myself before the reality set in at my wedding. It is very true that people of wealth often utilize planners; usually, their planners are celebrities or well-known event coordinators who work with huge staffs. But on a much smaller scale, the use of a wedding planner is no longer considered a luxury; rather, it is a necessity. The planning process provides more time for the bride to take care of herself. The planner also is the sole contact for all other activities that need to occur and be managed for the wedding. And no bride wants to handle all of that, right? No, they do not, nor will they have the time to.
5. The Wedding Planner Wants To Control Everything
This is absolutely a myth. From one standpoint, the wedding planner does want to create a sense of structure to the day based upon the desires of the client. For example, if one member of the wedding party tends to start the cocktail hour before the ceremony, then the planner will need to keep things structured to get through the most important event of the day. However, if the bride wants to veer off from a traditional wedding, utilize unique color schemes, or even change the wedding program at the last minute, the wedding planner is there to support her and make things happen as smoothly as possible.
Five Truths About Wedding Planners.
Wedding Planners Handle Every Situation With Empathy
At some point, every wedding planner has been in the same position as the bride or groom. We’ve seen everything, so we have a good idea of how to make things better.
2. Wedding Planners Pay Attention To Every Detail
We take notes, ask questions, and provide constant communication so that the client knows that their wedding planner is there to support them.
3. Wedding Planners Tend To Be Organized Yet Flexible
As mentioned above, there are many branches to the wedding tree that need to be managed. Wedding planners are flexible to the changes and mishaps that arise during wedding days, so we know how to proceed effectively.
4. Wedding Planners Are Creative
Like myself, some wedding planners are also decorators who have an eye for recognizing the exact accent piece that will tie the event’s ambiance together, whether that be a pop of color or a special song or moment.
5. Wedding Planners Need a Timeout
I know you think this sounds funny, but these timeouts are not for bad behavior. At some point during the planning and coordinating process, you wedding planner will need to take a moment of downtime. After all, your planner will be the first to arrive and the last to leave the event. Wedding planners need a quick moment to rejuvenate and revive so they can continue being your point of contact even after the wedding day.
If any of these points sound relatable, consider revisiting the need for a wedding planner. These tips should help you view things through a new and clearer lens, just as they did for me.
Written by: Brenda Domingo, Owner and Lead Event Coordinator at Favor The Moment LLC